Today I am the Slack Motherfucker

I am itchy to be anywhere but here.  The weather is actually cooperating and acting like spring, which is making me want to design and make clothes.  I have a bunch of hides as well as some other fabric to work with, and I think I know what direction I'd like to go.

Well, sometimes I do.  Other times, I have no idea what I need in my closet.

I think I've cemeted my job here, at least for a while.  I met with the boss today as well as the uber boss, and I'm comfortable with my role again.  The uber boss is now aware that I really, really don't want to go to a development group.  I worried about this all last week because he was out sick for four days after door-popping me and telling me that I "might have to be moved to a development group."

Every time this happens, my work life goes to shit.  I function much better as a developer within another group.  This way, I can just do what they need done.  Once you're in a pool of developers, you drift away from direct projects and often have group-think enforced...which is just bad for me.  I need full lifecycle control, because that's just how I am.  Typically, pooled developers aren't ever given the big picture, and I really prefer to have that information.  I can't understand why people don't realize that I have their best interests at heart when I want to know in detail what it is they are trying to get out of my reports.

Also, I never fit in socially with groups of developers.   Maybe web developers, but not general developers.  I'm not sure why this is.  I just feel like I have nothing in common with them.  Usually, I'm the only white female, and I admit that's part of the problem.  Often, I'm also the only native speaker of English, which further alienates me.

So, this shouldn't happen now.  Yay.

Man, I want to go home.  I'm such a bad worker when I'm not crazy busy.  I am very bad at pretending to work, but if you give me lots of work, I rise to the challenge.

I've also managed to pull that shoulder muscle that tends to go when I've been doing a lot of upper body work with no actual preparation for such work.  I wish it were so hard for me to do this stuff that I couldn't injure myself, but it's not.  Once I start doing a task, I'm like the fucking Energizer Bunny all full of energy, and I don't feel the pain until the next day.  My tendonitis has also flared up from all the raking, but I that doesn't even hurt compared to my shoulder.

That's really saying something.

I'm just trying to ignore it.

I'm backpacking this upcoming weekend and I'm pretty happy about that.  I've decided to link up my 1999 miles with my current Virginia miles.  While I could do those 15 miles in one day, I'd probably hurt myself since even thru-hikers say they are very bad miles.  I hope I can force myself to stay to 7 miles for each day.

I've been wearing a knee brace for the yard work and my knee has been fine.  Cross your fingers for me.